This is something I have pondered on for years. What is a friend? Everyone I ask see it differently. One person may define one as "a person you know well and regard with affection and trust." Another may define one as "acquaintance: a person with whom you are acquainted." Yet another may define one as someone you just hangout with or talk to sometimes (this would be Johnathan's definition as long as you play with him and do it his way then you are his friend).
I think I am closer to understanding what I think a friend is and that means I do not have many. A friend is someone I can talk to at any time so that would rule out half the people I know because there are certain times of the day that I can not talk to them. A friend is someone who will you call every now and then to see how you are doing even if it is weeks or months apart. That means you call them and they call you not just one person doing all the calling or at least a email occasionally and not something that was just forwarded from someone else. A friend is a person that will tell you the truth even when you don't want to hear it. Even though the conversation may get ugly they still let you know what the truth is despite how you feel about it. Then when the truth has opened a deep wound that person is still there to help you mend it, that's a friend. A friend is a person who will stand behind you and support you even when they know what you are getting ready to do is ignorant and stupid. And then when you fall they are there to help you pick yourself up and move forward.
Then there is the title best friend. Will someone please tell me what that is? Because I am almost 40 years old and I have not figured this one out yet. Google says it is the friend that is closest to you that you trust and share everything with you know their family members and they know yours. I guess because I have never really had or maybe because I don't have one now I don't know what that is.
I would definitely love some feedback on this subject. So everyone feel free to comment.
Monday, July 09, 2007
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3 comments:
Even though I'm not available to you all the time, I consider you a good friend. I have had an occassion lately to think about this subject and it came to my attention that I really don't have any girlfriends outside of work. I always say that I can't be a friend so I don't expect anyone to be my friend but the world would be a lonely place without friends to lean on once in awhile. I guess a friend is whatever (or whoever) you choose to define as friend.
I personally don't have any good friends (nor am I a good friend in return) by your definition- even under the worst circumstances, I tend to brood rather than call on people so I don't inconvenience them. Not to mention that I have difficulty calling someone up that I haven't talked to in awhile- I always feel kind of weird, so rather than bridging that gap, I just let it grow bigger. Bottom line, I am lazy, and I don't think you can be a great friend if you are too idle- like any relationship, it takes a lot of work.
I am probably too young to have much help/advice to give, but you can always talk to me, and I will try to give you a straight answer from my point of view (for what that's worth)!
I love you.
You are my sistergirlhomiefriend always.
I think friend is what you want it to be. I think that there are some people that just dont/wont get close to people...so a friend to them may be different that someone that is close. I think people need to know and define what THEY need in a friendship because those needs vary.
I agree a lot of what you said about qualities of a good friend. Those are qualities I expect. As far as best friends, I think there are certian people in your life that just plain hold a more significant role in your life. You were there for the birth of Jevon-and have been here ever since. My sis listens and often holds less judgement for me than I do myself. Brandy has been here to get me through soooo much. Ted and I totally get each other...good and bad--plus he makes me laugh my ass off. I think each person you allow in your life, has a purpose, whether it is a good or bad purpose, there still is one you know?
Thats my 2 cents. Anyway. I love ya ma.
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